Antenatal results and choices

This group offers you compassionate support and understanding from other families who have shared similar experiences.

ARC – antenatal results and choices

One of the hardest things a parent can ever face is the impossible decision to end a much wanted pregnancy.  This often happens when a scan highlights an anomaly and the family are then referred to the fetal medicine team.   We understand that, if you are faced with this situation, you will most likely want to ask questions and talk with others who can either give advice or more information.  To help with this, we work collaboratively with ARC (ante natal results and choices) a charity specialising in supporting families who find themselves in this position. More details of the charity and their support can be found here http://www.arc-uk.org/. In 2016 SANDS Lothians established the first collaborative support group in the UK to give families the opportunity to talk with others who understand how difficult this path is.  This group meets every 3 to 4 months but families are reminded, and encouraged, to attend our other monthly support groups and can access one to one befriending or counselling in between.

Please know you would be made very welcome by others who understand and want to support you.  You are not alone at this time.

Below in the video, Shona Mair, one of our befrienders, talks about her own
experience and the importance of this group.

“When I heard those words at my 19 week scan; “I’m sorry I have to stop the scan – your baby has a number of abnormalities.”, my world imploded.  This was my third pregnancy and I have one living daughter.  We were told shortly after that our son had significant spina bifida with severe hydracephalus.  I didn’t know what to do. I felt completely lost and alone. I never in a million years thought that I would be put in a position to make a decision about ending the pregnancy of my child who I loved deeply.  In the end we decided to take the pain for our son and he was born on the 3rd of June.  I felt guilt and deep, deep sadness and I didn’t know where to turn.  Fortunately, I had a colleague who had experienced a similar loss and she put me in contact with SANDS Lothians’ ARC.  This was a life line for me. I finally had people I could talk to and would understand and not judge me.  The first meeting I had with Nicola I poured my heart out and she listened.  She showed me so much kindness as have the other members of this group, they have been kind to me when I couldn’t be kind to myself and for that I will be forever grateful.” Louise McCallum